Eagles - Long Road Out of Eden

Last night I stopped at Wal Mart and bought a cd. This is the first time in probably 15 years that I've bought a cd there. I generally refuse to buy cds from them because I strongly oppose their fraudulent schemes of selling modified cds to unknowing customers. Wal Mart has had a long standing policy not to sell cds with explicit lyrics or content, which is fine. If you want to play a holier-than-thou role in your music department even though you seem to overlook the bikini posters, trashy romance novels, r-rated movies and whore dolls (bratz), then fine. But what pisses me off beyond belief is that Wal Mart does not tell you what cds have been altered, so you can not make the decision for yourself as to which you'd prefer. Unless you already know the album well enough to know whether or not it's likely to be altered, what you buy may or may not be the "actual" album. It's this shuck & jive that I think is unethical and deceptive.

But last night, thanks to the Eagles almighty greed, I was forced to buy their new 2-CD set at Wal art, who is the exclusive seller of the album. I do hope that my contribution is able to help Don Henley get back on his feet.

Anyway, criticism of Don Henley aside, I wanted to post a review of the album. This is the Eagles first cd of all new material since... shit... a long time ago. I think that their last all-new album was in 1980 or slightly before that.

The album opens with a 2 minute track (dispite the album cover's advertisement of a 4:00 length) titled "No More Walks In The Wood". The song is a sappy 4-part harmony with a little big of accidental guitar play. I'm not sure what to make of this tune. It sets the tone for the first cd as very somber and lackluster. I could have done without Henley's tree hugging lyrics.

The second song is "How Long" which is their release that's on the radio and getting moderate airplay. Unlike the first song, this is an upbeat song that has a great beat and has a little bit of that old Eagles sound. This isn't surprising considering that it is written by J.D. Souther, who wrote a lot of the classic Eagles tunes, including Take It Easy, which this song is fairly reminescant of. It's got a clean snappy sound, with similarly clean and snappy vocals that roll off the tongue and whether you want to or not, your foot will start tapping along with the spunky beat. This is the song that should have opened this album.

The third song, Busy Being Fabulous" is one of many Henley & Frey written songs on the album. In general, the songs that these two have written have a clearly different sound than their older stuff, and definately shows a more relaxed and mature side. Unfortunately, it seems that without the cocaine and alcohol-fueled songwriting binges of old, their lyric writing really has gone to shit. Like a lot of their older stuff, this song is pessemistic and a bit dark, the slower tempo and lackluster music and lyrics just wind up sounding like complaining instead of a finely woven tapestry of intentionally vague lyrics and powerful guitar work. I think Don Felder's absence has taken away that amazing dual-guitar sound that makes the old Eagles sound so recognizable.

Song 4 is "What Do I Do With My Heart". This is a Frey tune. This song sounds like it's straight off some sappy made for TV movie chick flick soundtrack. I think Henley was on a piss break during this song, so they just set up a computer beat box instead of using live percussion. Joe Walsh sounds like he's getting ready for a Weather Channel background music gig. It's sure no Desparado, that's for sure. Glen Frey sounds as good as ever though. Later on in the song Henley sings too. Somebody could pull this song out of the shitter and make a good duet out of it, but not with 2 dudes singing it.

Song 5 is "Guilty Of The Crime". This is one of the few songs that Joe Walsh sings. This song wasn't written by any of the band members. Joe Walsh reminds me of Ozzy. The dude did way too many drugs and drank for way too long, and it shows. He can barely talk, but oddly enough, as bad as it probably is, I still love his singing voice. This is an upbeat song, and Joe's guitar work is very reminescant of the older Eagles stuff, but the mix subdues it too much and makes it sound too "pop" oriented. This song would probably sound great on a live album, but whoever mixed it in the studio killed it.

Song 6, "I Don't Want To Hear Any More" is sung by Timothy B. Schmidt. This song sounds like a blend of Beegees and James Taylor. It's a bit sappy for my tastes, but I have a feeling that it'll grow on me. It reminds me of the Schmidt-sung song on Hell Freezes Over (Love Will Keep Us Alive), but like with the other songs here, without that 2nd guitar from Felder, the music is just flat.

"Waiting In The Weeds" is a henley tune. This song has the lyrics. The negative air, and the somewhat vague point. Unfortunately, the music is missing. Needs more cowbell!

"No More Cloudy Days" is a song that the Eagles performed on their last live DVD. It's a pretty good Glenn Frey tune, and the music isn't bad either.

"Fast Company" has a nice bass guitar beat. Henley is singing in a pretty high octave, and when combined with the low octave harmony, it really seems to produce a sound reminescant of Prince. It kind of wierds me out hearing the Eagles sing like Prince.

"Do Something" opens very similarly to "Friends In Low Places" but instead turns into a ballad sung by Schmidt. Lyrics are good. This has a nice southern balad sound to it, with guitar work that has a steel lap guitar kind of sound. This song is rapidly growing on me.

"You Are Not Alone" is another slow one, and it ends the first cd. This is a Glenn Frey tune. Upbeat message, downbeat tempo. This sounds a little like christian music but without mentioning god. This seems like it would make a good theme song for that Joel Osteen televangelist show. Fortunately, it's short.

The second cd starts off with the title track, "Long Road Out Of Eden". It opens with a very middle-eastern type of sound, then transitions into a slow keyboard solo. Guitar comes in right before Henley's lyrics. The lyrics paint a picture of despair, confusion, internal conflict. The music paints a setting of mystery, dark, and is a perfect compliment to the lyrics. This song really works. Without a doubt, this is the best song on the album. Unfortunately, it's 10 minute length means it'll never get put on the radio unless they come out with a shortened version. Guitar work, though subdued in the mix, has a great Walsh sound. In fact, about 5 minutes in, Walsh belts out an 80's power balad-esque guitar solo until you think the song is over... but oh no, there's more! More creepy middle-eastern sound effects, then the song slowly picks up again, continuing past the 10 minute mark before finally coming to an end. The only part that is strange, is that the very end of the song goes out with a single drum beat like what you usually hear in war movies. I really can't figure out the significance of it, and it doesn't match anything else in the song. Overall though, this tune almost sounds like what I think an Eagles cover of a Mark Knopfler song would sound like.

"I Dreamed There Was No War" is the 2nd song on the 2nd cd. I figured I'd hate this song, and I prepared myself for a Don Henley "why the war is bad and why republicans suck" political statement, but instead I was treated to a short instrumental with a guitar and some violins in the background. This reminds me of the "Wasted Time Reprise" bit on the Hotel California cd. It's damned good. Too bad Henley couldn't pick a more neutral title for it, but then again, I think its title and it's position after Eden were completely intentional. I can't shake this feeling that the Eden song is a disguised anti-war, "it's all about oil" statement, and making this a pseudo "Eden-reprise" with an anti-war name helps make it a bit more obvious for those of us who aren't quite insightful enough to fully realize what the Eden song is about.

The music picks back up with "Somebody", another one of the songs not written by the Eagles. There's good bit of bass guitar work that sounds very similar to the bass style that you hear from John McVie from Fleetwood Mac. In fact, this whole song has a Fleetwood Mac kind of sound.This song is sung by Glenn Frey. He sings in a style that's a bit out of his ordinary, and I'm not sure he pulls it off. Music is upbeat.

"Frail Grasp Of The Big Picture" is another one of Henley's complaining songs. Henley is The song isn't bad, just not overly inspiring. As he does far too often on this second disk, Henley can't refuse the opportunity to let his anti-American views shine through. "Good ol' boys down at bar - peanuts and politics, they think they know it all, they don't know much of nothin'"...And we pray to our lord, who we know is american... he speakes to us through middlemen and he shepherds his flock...he supports us in war, he presides over football games." Too repetitive, too much chorus, too much goddamned complaining.

"Last Good Time In Town" is next. Did Carlos Santana join the Eagles? Nope, that's Joe Walsh singing. But is Santana playing guitar? Nope, just walsh, but I'll be damned if it doesn't sound like Santana. This is a pretty cool song. Upbeat sound, typical Joe Walsh sound once it gets going.

"I Love To Watch A Woman Dance" is another song that the Eagles didn't write. Glenn Frey sings it. This sounds like something from Winnie the Poo.

"Business As Usual" is a Henley tune. Seems like mainstream Henley here... not much different than a lot of the stuff on his solo albums.

"Center Of The Universe" is a slow song. Love songs aren't exactly an Eagles strength, and this song certainly isn't changing that.

The second cd finishes with "It's Your World Now", written and sung by Glenn Frey. This song has a mexican salsa kind of sound. Makes me want tacos. And a labotomy.

My overall impression of the album is that it was worth the money. However, I just can't escape the sheer irony of the Eagles, who for years have sung about corporate greed, and in just yet another example of "do as I say and not as I do", choose Wal Mart to be the sole seller of their new album.